Dear Annika

Dear Annika, Why would you go and blow my cover? I thought we were friends, but apparently we're not. You know why? Because a real friend wouldn't reveal my true location after I had to defect to cover her ass after she "inadvertantly" directed a drone bomber to take out a whole herd of moose. I even told you that if you did that you'd be taking out a third of Norway's population, but would you listen? No, you had to go into the Scandinavian wilderness with your guns blazing, just to prove how tough you were. And I took the heat for you. You know why? Because that's what friends do. Now I was just starting to get settled down in the Yukon, but I guess I'm going to have to move somewhere else. I'll just have to tell my friends where to write me. But I'm not going to tell you. You know why? Because you betrayed my trust, and that hurts more than Laplander ice torture. Sincerely, XXXXX